11th September 2007 - Tuesday
Overcast, Thunderstorm
6:43 am - Tired but rather light hearted

Life Goes On - The Brand New Chapter

Morning Blues..
Finally finished my kick-ass 19 paged lab report a moment ago... took me two whole nights of staying up through the night, like 2 zillion, 181 trillion, 456 billion, 21 million, 259 thousand 4 hundred and 21 brain cells dead and non-stop typing action in front of the screen before I finally finished it.. really quite tiring I must say...
Been sleeping only early in the morning these two days...
Hmm.. but then again, when do I ever not??? o.O

Anyways.. i just realised I don't have 9:30 lab tomorrow morning!!!
*Jumps for joy*

Anyways.. finally closed the door on the previous chapter of my life.. one that lasted for 2 long years, and probably never really got exciting until the last 4 months or so, when it suddenly transformed from a cheap boring novel remake to a hollywood blockbuster hit complete with special effects and lightings :b

And it's rather pleasing and comforting to realise that my life suddenly becomes so much more simpler.. and that each day passes so much easier..
Guess all the action in the past few weeks really took the toil and the fight out of me bah... didn't really have the motivation and the mood to do anything at all in all that time...
But now, it feels different.. so much lighter, so much right-er, if there ever was a word like that..
no more heavy burden, no more feelings of guilt and pain.. no more problems you have to think about...
Yes, there would still be that passing feeling of emptiness..
like you've lost something that was once really important to you in your life..
moments of happiness that you know deep inside, you would never be able to bring back..
items now locked away in your cupboard..
items that reminds you of the once blissful past..
also items that makes the present so much more difficult to bear..
that's why they are locked away..
only to serve as precious memory reminders years later...

Back then, I would feel like...
it doesn't matter how many new shoes I get
or lessons I go to
or how many glasses of chardonnay I drink with my friends..
I still go to bed every night
going over every detail
wondering what I might have did wrong
or how I could have misunderstood
and how in the hell for that brief moment I could think that I was that happy
and sometimes, I can even convince myself that she will see the light and show up at my door

But after all that
however long all that might be
I will go somewhere new
and I’ll meet people who will make me feel worthwhile again
and little pieces of my soul will finally come back
and all that fuzzy stuff
those years of my life that I wasted
that will eventually begin to fade

So yups.. that's my life now..
meeting new people, making new friends..
forming new 'bongs'???
trying to forget the past
waiting for the pain to fade completely

Will it ever fade???

Even the deepest pain will fade. all it takes is time :O)

Love the weather...
how I just ADORE rainy mornings with Friskies on my lap

7:32 am - sleepy yet warm